A Mother's Faith and An Angel...

It was past 2 AM on some specific day. I was unable to sleep because one issue kept me awake. Then my phone started ringing. It was an unknown number. Who the hell is this calling me this time?  I picked the call.

Because of one wrong decision my financial condition got sacked. I was getting the blame for everything. I was being blamed for all the wrong things for which I was not even responsible remotely. The people who used to leave their chair when I used to walk in any deal, now the same people had the words to talk ill about me. I did not have the job and my account balance showed only 1295.58 Rs even there was the pressure to feed my hunger and the incident threw me in deep debt. I did not have any way to repay.  My credentials had fallen in the market, so I was virtually banned to be in game until I restore the faith. People avoided me, so that I could not ask for the help. I had the perfect opportunity to see the real face of the people and I was afraid that I may cultivate the hatred towards the human kind.

"Pradeep Bhai...!!", I listened a familiar voice.

"Haan Bhai..," I replied and I did not know what to say next I just wanted to keep smiling on hearing this voice.

He questioned, " How are you doing?"
"I am going to survive some more days," I replied.

"Don't give up! Remember your mother..." He gave suggestion.

It was my cousin. With whom I grew up. I don't know where he is staying? Most of the time I doubt whether he is alive? He does not leave any footprints for the trace. Most of the time he keeps the hawk eyes what is going on with me. 

Years passed by I did not hear anything from him. I vividly remember he called me last time in Dec, 2011, when I was going through very serious illness. Pain was so intense that I was contemplating to kill myself. Then he came as the angel or "Alien"  to give me strength to fight with my physical and emotional condition . His words still echoed in my head "Remember your mother did not lose hope when everybody said to give her up. You are the product of hard work and dedication of your mother. You can't be weak." 

He was reminding me the situation when I had the polio in my neck then I was around one year old. Doctor advice that I am not going to be physically normal but my mother refused instead she fought with condition and took me for the treatment continuos 7 months without missing a single day. People mocked her. Some of the relative called her mad. She faced the scorching heat. She herself hit by heat stroke. Many times she faced the hailstorm. After all the hardship and her dedication I was looking physically well but treatment had killed my immunity. For this she fasted on Thursday for my well being until I have the moustache line on my face. I don't know whether her fasting help me in my health or not but her care did and her care did miracle. Believe me I trust in miracle. 

Now I was fighting with real problems and with real peoples who wore the facade. It was depressing and beyond this it was making me angry. The peoples reaction was so bad that I wanted to shoot them at the spot. I helped them grow and these people wanted me not to meet them. I was trying to find the shelter. I was desperately waiting for the miracle to happen but it was not happening.

"Yeah... I know," I replied and kept silent.

He said, "Pradeep, I can help you in this and everything will be fine within one week but I would not."

"Any reason for this decision?" I asked.

He replied, "Get out of this, you can do it and you can come strong..." and he did not answer my question.

It's his habit he never answered my questions. He left the questions for me to discover the answers.

"Good luck!" he said and cut call.

I tried to speak more with him back but he did not pick the call and few hours later that no. was switched off. Even I could not ask where he is and how is doing? I hope he would be doing well. Again, he disappeared like angel and did not hear again since then. Still I don't know where he is?

I did not sleep whole night. In morning, I decided to stop thinking whatever bad is happening with me and I decided to concentrate how to solve it. Miracle happened I found it once again. I got rid off the problem. I got rid off the peoples.

But, I am expecting could hear back from him. I am expecting my mother to stop fasting. She stopped for few weeks but she resumed again. May be she is still praying for my well being. May be he is watching me like angel. I know when I am in problem my mother prayer will bring me out and that Alien will come to guide me way out.

Perception of equalities?

"Would you like to come for coffee?" she enquired.

"No" the reply came out from my lips.

She was puzzled and was taken aback from my reply as if she was hearing the "No" word first time and I doubt such the beautiful girl would have got a "NO" for anything.

I was sitting at my desk since 3 hour straight and lunch time already had passed and I did not have any intention to leave.

"Did you have lunch?", again she questioned.

"No", I said and continued staring at the desktop screen.

"Why? Are you fasting or dieting?" again she pried.

I locked the desktop. "OK" lets go.

"Floor cafeteria or Ground cafeteria?",  I asked.

She expressed that she would like to have some snacks as well so I decided to go to Ground Floor's cafeteria.

After taking some snacks I took the table near to TV and she joined me at the table.

We faced each other and I did not say a word. I was enjoying my tea with chips. I was hungry and I was reluctant to leave my desk but here I was eating like starving man and tea and chips was trying to boost up my hunger instead of satisfy it. I finished my tea and chips even before she starts.

"What Pradeep! Coming with you is boring!", she responded on my action.

"First thing your words are offensive and second thing you are being judgemental early", I had to reply.

I observed that she was upset because I did not wait for her to start her snacks and I was not interested in the conversation.

"Are you dieting?" again she questioned.

Many times she asked about the status of my lunch but my reply was NO. She was being inquisitive about why I was not going for lunch and I used to have my snacks with my computer. Many times I had to share my snacks with her unwillingly.

"No. I am not dieting the reason I am not coming for the lunch that I don't eat alone." I tried to answer her curiosity.

She made her face like she was trying to find the dumbest answer possible for her question and still my answer was on the top dumbness' scale.

"Don't be surprised. I don't eat alone", I told in reply of her expression.

"Why are you sad?" I threw the sentence on her.

I made her astonished. Damn Me, I managed to offence her also.

She asked furiously,"Do I look sad?"

She wished me the morning with sparkling eyes and confidant face and few hours later her were red and face was tired as if she cried a lot.

"Why are you sad?", I put the same sentence with same tone and calmness.

She was getting angry but she calmed herself, she kept silent for few moments and said, "It's not your business."


I replied calmly yeah, it's OK. If you don't want to share I will not ask but why are you trying to divert your mind with an unknown person on this table whom you don't know at all except his name and employments' history?

She was listening carefully and fighting within herself to not let her tears appear in her eyes.

"Pradeep... You are heartless. If you can't help someone please don't make their situation worse" as she spoke and I could see her lips trembling as if she is going to burst in to tear.

"You are being judgemental early", I reiterated.

Some people are heartless because they never picked themselves after their fall. They refused to hold hands which came in the form of help when they were down.

When something pinches you, it so happens that you go into your "silent den" to get yourself healed. And it helps too.

It happened with me when I was badly hurt by someone very very dear to me. I stopped talking. My contact confined to my family. Many people offered help. I refused thinking I have to come out of this myself. Eventually I came out of it but it left a ugly scar.

Scars can't be healed. They project your heartlessness. Those people who are far from you see your emotional indifferences. But the people who are close, they know you are still the same person in a different way. More mature than before. More careful than before.

"Pradeep we are in 21st century and people are progressing, still there are disparity in society," She put her point with anger.

"I think we are not ready to handle the parity still, the society, whatever we are in,  is in perfect shape and balance, It's my thinking. It will evolve with us and will change with time but not immediately," I replied.

"What happened? Why are you blaming society?" I asked.

"My father  wants me to meet a boy for marriage", she replied.

"I don't see anything wrong in this, he is your father he would like to see you happy anyway," I spoke and, "I think our parents are smart enough to take decision".

"No! still they are orthodox", she replied and tried to reach the tissue paper to wipe her tears. I pushed the tissue paper towards her and I asked her "wipe as if you are wiping your face not tears, many eyes on us at this place we are sitting here since long time."

"Every generation think, they are smarter than their previous generation," I tried to clarify her thoughts, "Anything wrong with this boy?"

"No, I don't know about him much I know his name and where he works," she replied.

"OK! So what are the things stopping you to meet him? You will get to know him at least," I suggested.

"Pradeep, I earn more than him and I want to marry a guy who is successful", she replied.

"I think your concern is equality and equality must be understood from both end not from one and you are projecting this guy as a loser because he earns less than you?" I put my points in very serious tone.

"OK! I will meet him," she replied with chuckle, "And you are invited in my friend's birthday, may be there you can find your friend so that you don't have to remain hungry...."